This section is about mentoring others. There is a separate section on being mentored.
This section focuses on the concept of mentoring that is similar to how one advises their PhD students. However, it is important to note that our definition of mentoring is not solely limited to mentoring grad students. There are many great professors who mentor not only their grad students, but also undergrads.
If one searches on the word mentor, a phrase is often repeated, linking the word back to the Odyssey by Homer: a loyal adviser of Odysseus entrusted with the care and education of Telemachus. Think about what this implies. First, mentoring is a long-term relationship, not a few weeks or a few months. Second, it includes an element of providing some level of care beyond the purely academic. Third, it is about educating and teaching the student how to fish, and not rely on always being given the fish. It is not simply answering questions during office hours, or giving one or two bits of advice several times a year.
We view mentoring as a major commitment. In the beginning it is usually weekly or at least bi-weekly meetings. A mentor situation is not quarterly or yearly. It is not ad hoc. It is not strictly reactive. Mentoring is proactive with a plan and strategy for how to work with the mentoree. The word mentoring is often over-used and someone often called a mentor is not really a full-blown mentor; perhaps a white belt mentor versus a black belt. This section is about serious mentoring, the black belt variety. It is also possible to do a minor mentoring role, a green or orange belt; some contact once a month or every two months.
While the mentor might talk about themselves on occasion for the purpose of illustration or in normal social chitchat, the focus of mentoring is not the mentor. It is the mentoree.
Not everyone can be a mentor. And, not everyone can be mentored. There must also be a trust relationship and credibility factor between the mentor and mentoree. The mentoree must be open to constructive criticism, coaching and prodding with respect to deliberate practice, and be willing to take leaps of faith. On the opposite side, the mentor must be able to give constructive criticism, coach and prod where necessary, and be able to create discomfort at times.
The mentor is often asked to give career advice, and at times asked to weigh in on personal advice as well; as the relationship grows. This is a delicate balance and the mentor must know and respect the boundaries associated with the mentoree. Each situation will be different. The mentoree might also push boundaries and the mentor needs to be able to gently and firmly establish and maintain the boundaries.
A mentor role is a long-term commitment and can exist over decades. It should not be entered into lightly. That being said, it is also sometimes necessary to sever a relationship, wean someone off the mentoring dependency, arrange a succession plan with an alternate mentor, or negotiate a ‘divorce’.
Assume that a black-belt level of intensity mentor-mentoree relationship will be 1-2 hours each week; between emails and face-to-face meetings. There will be times where 3-4 hours in a week will be necessary, weekends, middle of the night, but these should be relatively rare.
Mentoring is not just solving problems or giving advice. As a teacher, the mentor must look for ways that the mentoree can grow, and the mentor must be an active teacher and coach.
